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Writing letters DOs and DONTs
letter_writing
Whether you are corresponding through e-mail, via website, or through regular snail mail, there are a few things common to any way of communication: things that you should and should not mention while you are getting to know each other.

DO NOT:
- Brag about your wealth: this can make it seem as if you are trying to buy her love. A woman, who is sincere in her intentions, will first of all be interested in you as a person.
- Go overboard with compliments Russian women are not used to hearing too many compliments. Besides, most women will want to be accepted as human beings, and be liked for their human qualities, brains, etc, not just for good looks.
- Do not use too strong emotional words in your initial correspondence: saying I love you or something similar in the first letters will make any woman cautious, and she most likely will not take you seriously.
- Do not talk about anything connected to other women in your initial letters (i.e. how painful it was to go through a divorce, how your previous girlfriend was ungrateful, etc). These sensitive and personal subjects can be discussed at a later date, when both of you are more comfortable with each other. Even if your Russian lady asks about your previous marriages/relationships, it will suffice to give her general information, excessive details can make it sound like you are still not over your exs or that you have not moved on from those relationships.
- Do not ask for her photo unless you have sent one. Once again, focusing on looks can give a woman impression that you are not interested in getting to know her and, therefore, are not looking for a serious relationship.
- Do not ask intimate questions, talk about sexuality, or send frank photos of yourself until you have found out your ladys preferences on such matters. Russian culture, although getting to be more relaxed now, is rather conservative in these issues, and it normally takes establishing serious connection with a Russian woman before she will be willing to open up about such things (if she had serious intentions, of course).
- Do not make your initial letters too long: while you are still getting to know each other, the last thing you want is for your Russian girl to get bored by the time she gets to the end of your letter.

On the other hand, you should DO:
- Point out things you liked about the woman that interested you in her character, the way she writes, things she has accomplished, etc this will show her that you are paying attention to substance and see her as a person.
- Tell her things that will show your financial stability: that you have a regular well-paying job, a house, a car, etc. The difference between bragging about your finances and talking about essentials is in making a woman feel secure and confident that you will be able to provide for your family, which is what most Russian women are looking for.
- Talk about things that are important for you in a partner. Talk about common interests you prefer, your expectations of your partner (for example, that you do or do not want for your future wife to work, etc).
- Be honest.. In everything!! This goes for your hair color, income, interests, relatives, etc. If you are seriously interested in finding a partner for life, any incoherencies will come to light sooner or later, which can cause your partner not to trust you. You can avoid such situations by being honest about your life, your expectations, etc.
- Tell a woman how you feel and this goes both ways, whether you like or do not like her. Once you know what you feel towards a woman, you should tell her about it. If you like her, this will provide clarity for both of you as far as developing your relationship further; if you do not like her it will save both of you time, but remember to be tactful when expressing this to her.
- Look for ways to make your communication exciting and memorable: make it stand out by sending postcards, small gifts, unusual letters, poems, etc. This will not only show your Russian lady that you are putting an effort, but will make your communication special and unique.
- If you are interested in a woman, make sure she can feel it in your letters: ask her questions about her life, about things that might interest you, show interest.

To make sure you are getting responses to your letters, know what you are looking for and be realistic in your expectations. Look for women who share your interests and lifestyle: for example, if you live in the country and like animals, chances are, you will have little in common with a woman who prefers theater, night life, fashion, etc. Make a list of priorities when deciding on criteria by which you select women; do not limit these criteria to looks only, make sure that you pay attention to other things of importance (family status, education, etc). Do not write to one woman only when you first start looking for a partner; the more people you come into contact with, the more chances you have for finding the person who will meet your demands.

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